There is a consensus that tardiness is a result of needless meticulousness or perfectionism. Those with manners are never tardy and people with apparent poor time management need to get organised, repeat tardiness without a genuine reason is poor behaviour, and to blame it on the fear of not wanting to be early is pathetic! After all, it is your responsibility. It might help to have a frank and honest discussion with the individual about their passive-aggressive way of showing their hostility towards you and clear the air. Your comment gives off the air of being the epitome of rude, disrespectful, insulting, and selfish! People Who Never Worry Have These 7 Habits in Common, 14 Wildly Successful Women Who Were Late Bloomers in Their Careers, No, Really: This Is the Secret to Age-Proofing Your Brain, 17 Strong Female Movie Characters to Watch When You Need Real-Life Confidence, 17 Healthy Habits You Need to Adopt in Your 20s S, 10 Powerful Life Lessons From Fearless Women Who Changed the World, Why Career Mapping Might Be Your Job Game Changer, People With These 4 Personality Traits Are More Likely to Cheat, People With These 3 Traits Are Universally Attractive, Says Science, I'm a Feng Shui Expert—Here's How to Optimize Your Bedroom, The Psychology Behind Chronic Overthinking (and How to Stop It), 15 Actionable Ways You Can Choose to Be Happy—Starting Right Now, 7 Healthy Habits Every 30-Something Needs, 10 of the Best Self-Love Books For When You Need to be Your Own Hero, The 17 Best Books About Astrology (If You're Looking to the Stars for Answers), Born Under the Cancer Sign? Like the article mentioned, I also aim at being on time instead of hanging around 20-30 minutes early just to give the impression of not being "rude", "disrespectful", "insulting", or "selfish". You probably know someone who just never shows up when you want them to, armed with an excuse when they finally appear 20 minutes later. Time is a construct, after all, so why wouldn’t it be subjective? But just as we hate to be late, another cohort hates to be early. A person who is always late is called a “flake.” This is, of course, slang. I don’t know how ADHD has affected certain areas of my brain but this is one area that has been particularly frustrating over the years. The average time after which the Type As felt a minute had passed was 58 seconds, which is unbelievably close, while the average time after which the Type Bs felt a minute had passed was 77 seconds, which is hilariously far! I am married to someone who demands I be chronically early. There are various reasons. It doesn't necessarily feel good to arrive alone, but it's less stressful than missing the best parts of a performance. It's better than not showing up at all, isn't it? The bottom line for me is this: depending on the circumstances, I'll be early, on time, or late to a meeting. I can tell that they (and you) come across as judgmental, anxious to point out the faults of others as opposed to actually showing empathy (again, a trait YOU offered as exemplary in a non-narcissist). Rude or selfish, perhaps, especially if they don't consider the feelings of others, although I don't know if that's the case with most people that are perpetually tardy. Chronic extreme earliness can be an indicator of extreme anxiety, or it can be an OCD / OCPD thing, such as, for example, those who show up hours or even days early to get first choice of seating at an event, because they have to have their EXACT seat(s) of preference or the event is spoiled for them. But chronic extreme lateness is different; its a repeating pattern of behavior that is specific to covert hostility: it's passive-aggressive, its a dominance behavior or a rebellious behavior, and it's a narcissistic behavior. Too … That 18-second difference can add up. They just have a lot on their plate—just ask any small-business owner or working mother. Kohn suggests a couple of reasons why people could be chronically late — perhaps they enjoy the attention of making an entrance, or maybe they are too self involved and wrapped up in their own lives and needs to care that they make people wait. These anti-early birds really want to be punctual—they just prefer to be right on time. That leaves us with the problem of motivation: How can an anti-early bird just bite the bullet and risk being early to be on time?
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